Shaq for president

Today lighthearted day for The Annalog. Why? You might well ask. Our armed forces are stretched to the breaking point in Iraq just when we might need them in Iran. Our president refused to disclose, not only which of us he is spying on, but what he was doing while New Orleans flooded. We can’t even trust our drug-addled memoirists anymore. but have no fear, Annalog readers, someone has come to save us in our hour of need. That someone is Shaquille O’Neal.

I was not always pro-Shaq. After his comments to fellow NBA player Yao Ming, I thought Shaq was little more than an inarticulate manchild. But 2005 brought a reversal. In September, Shaqchased down a man who was harassing a gay couple, then helped Miami police to arrest him. This was enough to turn my heart into a Love Shaq. Today, I found out that Shaq will be joining a task force to track down Internet sex predators.

With all that’s going on in the world, it’s nice to know that Shaq is keeping our daughters safe.


4 Responses to “Shaq for president”

  1. Not Just Daughters Says:

    Plenty of Internet sex predators go after little boys, as well. It’s a dangerous world out there for girls with dicks too, Annalog.

  2. Marisa Says:

    What about boys with C U Next Tuesdays? Buck Angel put himself on the net… what is Shaq going to do about that?

  3. Buck Says:

    I’m a grown (wo)man. I’m a baddass motherfucker. I don’t need Shaq defending me and I definitely don’t need you invoking my name as if you knew anything about the transsexual experience.

  4. Marisa Says:

    I am sure that Shaq will defend all children, regardless of sex, from Internet Predators. As someone unfamiliar wih the transsexual experience, I’m not sure what Not Just Daughters meant by ‘girls with dicks’, but if they need Shaq’s help, they should ask him to address their needs.

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